The Long Night

The Long Night

The Long Night is upon us again.

Don’t blink.

Because, yes, this is Her Night. My Lady. Mother Darkness, the Lady of Those Who Survive, Queen of the Night, She Who Submits, the Mistress of Harlots, the Left Hand of the Divine. . .

Those who serve my Lady, who revel in the shadows, and who embrace their own darkness find that Yule is not the celebration of the birth of Lord, but the time when our Mother wandered alone after being cast out from the Garden for the sin of self-determination. In Her wanderings, She took strength from that which She had learned when She Served as Consort to the Most High — that even as you submit in body you never have to submit in spirit and that to submit in spirit is a Mystery all it’s own, full of grace and terrible beauty. It is a time of introspection, a time to look at ourselves and our desires, to re-dedicate ourselves to our own Service — to look at the Shadow within and try to discover the Mystery that She shared with the world as She wandered. Scattered with Her tears as She wept in the knowledge of what was to come as well as with what had gone before. Scattered with Her blood as the thorns of the world caught her while she walked, and as the scourges of the Elohim had lashed Her as she fled the Court of the Most High.

It is a lonely path at times, a hard path — but our Lady is not so cruel as to demand that we walk it alone as She did. For one we can walk the path with Her, as She can always be found in the Darkness if we look. For another, as we are able, we may walk the path with our lovers. . .

The Mystery of Service is another thing that we may take comfort from. . . and not something to written here. It will burn you if you find it, even as it burned Her — and the pleasure that comes from the burning is ecstasy.


Eat the Darkness — take nourishment from your own dark natures. They are a part of you, no matter how troubling they are.

However, those who feed on their Darkness are fed upon in turn. Do not be consumed by your Shadow, it is always there, and is a hungry beast. The Lady will take the Offerings of both Angel and Monster — She cares not for the laws of men. We dance creation and destruction in our Service, She desires both — and dances upon the bodies of Her lovers even as She takes Her pleasure from them.

So, for those reading this who take pleasure in their own Darkness, take the timeless hours of the Long Night to wander in the Darkness even as our Mother did. Stare into deep into yourselves and listen to Her sweet whispers, and hope that you get a glimpse of the Mystery that is Her Service.

I will be.

© by Edward Dain.
Edited by Sheta Kaey.

“Edward Dain” is the long standing pseudonym for a “squicky, neoshamanistic, Ordeal Path, Leatherman.” Given his skills and focus, he has been known to introduce himself as “the guy your High Priestess warned you about.” Despite this people still tend to think he is a nice person and seem interested in the opinions he has formed over a quarter-of-a-century of esoteric practice. A practicing therapist who specializes in sexual minorities and relationships, “Edward Dain” also values his work with religious and spiritual minorities. Currently he is completing his internship, the final requirement for the award of his doctorate in Clinical Psychology.

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6 Responses to “The Long Night”

  1. Sheta Kaey says:

    This has to be about Kali….

  2. Edward Dain says:

    Actually no, though I’ll admit that “dances on the bodies of Her lovers” might be a bit confusing. I have a great deal of respect for Kali, but this is a different Mother.

    That said, if it speaks to you as Kali, run with it. I suspect that They’re at least cousins.

  3. Grey Glamer says:

    I read the first part especially as references to Lilith, though as Edward noted, I suspect there’s a common archetype of the Dark Mother which we read through our own idiosyncratic paradigms.

    This is one moving reminder of the endless struggle for self-realization, something which can seem especially difficult in these long winter nights, and for this I thank you.

    So often we live in fear of our own desires, our innermost impulses. As someone who follows an (extremely) idiosyncratic take upon the Left Hand Path, I think it’s important we learn to listen to the dark, scary elements within ourselves – because when we do, we usually find they’re not so dark and scary, after all. They’re only scary when we ignore them, when we refuse to look upon temptation squarely, when we allow our complexes to twist tighter and tighter beyond all reason.

    Just my two cents. May the Dark Mother, by whatever names we might call Her, smile upon us all.

    Blessed Be!
    .-= Grey Glamer´s last blog ..Thinking about Thinking =-.

    • Edward Dain says:

      Grey Glamer,

      I’m hoping that my older essay, “Evil is As Evil Does” can be ressurected from the pre-move RTV as it addresses a bit what you are mention here.

      I will say that I would emphasize the “usually” in your statement. “Nice” is a social construct, and what you or I may find acceptable may very well be immoral for others or illegal for anyone. Similarly, there’s nothing wrong with things being dark and scary – fear is a very good and useful emotion…

      In any case, thank you for some very kind words and for commenting!

  4. Tonya Kay says:

    Thank you for honoring the Dark! I have joined you in the blind walk.
    .-= Tonya Kay´s last blog ..Updated December 19th, 2009 =-.

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