I have found the totemic answer to the “Teen Witch Kit.”

There has been a recent fad ever since Silver Ravenwolf came out with her kit in 2004. A number of authors have come up with similar prefabricated spell kits, meditation kits, and similar “everything you need in one box!” kits since the TWK came out (despite the fact that the reviews on it were largely negative).

Farber and Zerner have found their own niche in this fad with the Animal Powers Meditation Kit. It includes a small booklet, a number of cards with pictures of the animals on them, a CD to go along with your meditations, and twelve pendants, one for each animal covered, with a cord to hang them on.

At first I thought, “Hey, this is a great idea!” The authors don’t claim that this is the do-all and end-all of totemic work; it’s their own system that they created, based on their own meditations. It’s obvious that they put a lot of thought into it, and that it’s very personal to them. They also avoided the bulk of cultural appropriation that so many totemic authors fall into.

The artwork is absolutely beautiful; woodcuts by Zerner’s mother, and Zerner’s own collages, illustrate the kit with vibrant colors and vivid representations of the animals. And the idea of the kit it self isn’t so bad: a book to help you learn meditations while focusing on the card that represents a particular animal whose qualities you want to emulate, listening to a CD with music and affirmations associated with that animal, and wearing the pendant of the animal to help remind you that you do have those qualities.

Unfortunately, the actual execution wasn’t all that great. The booklet is only 43 pages long, and while the material is good, I was left wanting to know more. How did they develop this system? Do they have any anecdotes as to how it has helped them or other people? Has the kit been “road-tested” by other people?

Additionally, because of the structure of the kit, it’s limited to only 12 animals, and most of these are more “popular” ones — bison, horse, cat (cougar), etc. Only one insect (butterfly), and dolphin represented all aquatic life. While there’s variety compared to, say, the books that try to be more Indian than thou, it’s still pretty limited. Their writings on those animals are decent, but I think they could have gotten away with about 30 animals in this format. If making the pendants was an issue, they could have done 15 double-sided ones.

And that leads me to the “extras.” The CD, while well-intentioned, didn’t impress me. I was enjoying the music — until the people (I’m assuming the authors) started talking. Gods love them, I’m sure they put a lot of effort into writing just the right affirmations, but the only thing I could think of was “New Age Animal Totem Spoken Word.” I don’t know if it was just the way they recited them, but it did not work for me at all.

The cards that you contemplate during meditation are quite lovely, and I like the concept. Part of the cardboard packaging is designed to stand up and display an individual card, which is a nice way to keep from wasting even more cardboard and plastic (these kits tend to require a lot more packaging than you’d think). The pendants had nice little designs based on the woodcuts, but the plastic used was incredibly cheap. They’d look a lot less tacky if good quality resin had been used.

This is why mass-manufactured “kits” aren’t really my favorite thing in the world. I like handmade spell kits made by individual pagans and shops, because the items inside are of a good quality and are often given blessings by the creator. This, and all manufactured kits, falls far short of that level of quality.

All in all, as I said, the idea was a good one, but the execution could have been so much better. Two pawprints out of five.

Review ©2007 Lupa
Edited by Sheta Kaey.

I’ll admit that when I first heard of this book, I was really skeptical. When it was published, I didn’t know Taylor, and I remember the calls that he was a sellout, a poser, and an idiot. That a book based on popular culture and especially the “Buffy Summoning” was just a stupid, fluffy concept. I refrained from commenting because I hadn’t read the book, but to me it sounded interesting since at its core, as Chaos magick uses the same concept.

Now I’ve read this book and I think it deserves an honored place next to Oven Ready Chaos. For those of you who aren’t familiar with that book, it is considered to be a seminal work of Chaos magick.

I will state this from the outset — this is not a book for a novice magician. It is a book that is dense with information and it makes huge assumptions as to the reader’s experience level and knowledge. This is a text that pretty much requires that the reader be very familiar with their own magickal system and to have multiple years of experience casting spells and manifesting their desires.

Taylor takes the reader from that starting point and shows them how their magickal works can be even better by using pop icons in their workings. The primary concept in this book is that if magick is affected by the amount of people believing in it, then it can be made even more effective by using symbols and icons that masses of people already believe in, like pop culture icons. Using a figure like Wolverine from the X-Men for the cynical Ronin figure in a working for warriors would be even more effective since Wolverine himself has such a fan following, and belief has already charged the idea of Wolverine that you will be using. Heck, to listen to many scholars, this is exactly how the Gods were created — a pop culture icon given enough power and belief so that it goes really well.

He explores this concept as well as the benefits and pitfalls of working with this kind of energy. He also shares some personal works and examples throughout. Just about every mass media method of communication is listed, with a few exceptions. While television, music and movies are all put together in one chapter, it is still noted that it is possible to work with those entities coming from that media outlet. I think I also just realized why he gives those such a brief treatment; the fact that icons coming from those outlets pass by in a flash and by the time one really learns the icon well enough to work with it, the attention of the culture as a whole has moved on to other things.

There are some things I had a problem with, and it is not the material itself.

His delivery is pretty dry throughout. This is partly because of his background in academia, which tends to dislike descriptive and imagination stirring phrases. The tone, while sounding arrogant, actually isn’t. It is the tone one generally has when very experienced in an aspect of life and are trying to transmit that professional competence to an audience.

The anime part of the book, where he is taking specific anime series and using them to illustrate his point, uses series that are popular but may not be known to the reader. One example of this is he goes into great detail comparing the anime series Neon Genesis Evangelion to the Kaballah (which honestly I believe it is based on in the first place). Throughout that section he makes a basic assumption that the reader is as familiar with the series as he is, so he doesn’t explain things to those who may not know what happens in the series. Readers would have to watch the entire series and the movie just to make sense of that section of the book. He does this again and again in the video game section as well, and you can see hints of it in other areas. So while the concepts are solid magical work, these sections I feel could lose the reader.

I’m going to give this book 4 stars out of 5, ultimately. The somewhat limited appeal, the assumption of knowledge in the latter chapters and the tone conspired to reduce the score from the 4½ I wanted to give it. But still, this is a hugely needed work, and anyone who is involved in the esoteric, magick, Discordianism, pop culture, chaos workings or even standard ceremonial magicians or witches would be well advised to read this book, if for no other reason than to understand this important core concept.

I know I’ll be recommending it to many, many others. Taylor, my hat is off to you, my friend. Well done.

Review ©2007 Eric “Daven” Landrum
Edited by Sheta Kaey

When I read the first half of this book I wasn’t initially impressed. Tyson did a good job of covering the history of tarot and laying out the basics, but I wanted to know when the reader would get to the meat of the book, i.e. the portable magic system he was talking about. It wasn’t until I reached the second half of the book that I got what I was looking for in this book — an innovative and original approach to utilizing tarot cards in magical practice.

In the second half of the book, using the Golden Dawn as his paradigm, Tyson explains how Tarot can be used in practical and metamorphic magic. He does an excellent job of laying out how his system works, and even explains how the magician can use the astrological correspondences in tandem with the rest of his system. What I really appreciated were the examples of workings he provided and his notes on how he personalized his own approach to Tarot magic, by changing some of the correspondences in the traditional Golden Dawn Paradigm. Additionally, it was heartening to see internal citations used in this book, a step up from the majority of works that are released without out those citations.

There are only two issues I had with the book. The first issue is the one I mentioned above in regards to the first half of the book. I’d have liked it if he’d cut down on some of the basics material, pointing readers to other works instead, so that he could focus his work more on his innovative approach. Additionally, while he referenced Golden Dawn ritual work for the Tarot, it would have been nice to have seen some focus on other approaches to Tarot that utilize ritual magic. Gareth Knight’s work and Mary K. Greer’s work particularly come to mind. These two issues lowered my rating to four out of five stars.

Review ©2007 Taylor Ellwood
Edited by Sheta Kaey

• Obituary — Robert Anton Wilson
• January Birthdays
• New Book Releases

Obituary — Robert Anton Wilson

Fnord By The Sea, January 11, 2007
Robert Anton Wilson 1932 — 2007
by Nicholas Graham

We have lost one of the great ones. At 4:50 a.m. local time on January 11, 2007, Robert Anton Wilson passed from this plane and into the realm of Pure Mind. Wilson has been a wide-ranging inspiration for those involved in psychology, occultism, literature, and the hard sciences due to his personal narratives of intensely spiritual experiences and bizarre reality fluctuations. He has proven to us that even after severe trauma, we can still live life with passion. RAW suffered polio twice, carrying with him a case of Post-Polio Syndrome which severely limited his mobility later in life. He lived to see one of his daughers killed in a robbery before reaching adulthood. He watched his beloved wife, Arlen Riley Wilson, pass on from this world. Yet through it all, Wilson maintained his love of life, his passionate optimism, his hope in humanity, and his unsinkable sense of humor. Robert Anton Wilson died as he lived: with hope in his heart and a joke in his brain. Our prayers go out to Wilson’s friends and family, but no sadness. We will smile in his memory!

RAW’s Works Include:

• The Illuminatus! Trilogy (with Robert Shea)
• Cosmic Trigger I : Final Secret of the Illuminati
• Prometheus Rising
• Everything Is Under Control: Conspiracies, Cults, and Cover-ups
• TSOG: The Thing That Ate the Constitution

Read, enjoy, and remember: the Universe is full of Maybes.

Robert Anton Wilson’s website may be found at http://www.rawilson.com
RAW Memorial February 2007 — date to be announced

©2007 Nicholas Graham
Edited by Sheta Kaey

Donald Tyson turned 53 years old on 12 January.

Gerald del Campo turned 47 years old on 14 January.

If you know of any birthdays we should have on file, please write to admin.

New Book Releases

The Four Powers by Nicholas Graham

Megalithica Books
ISBN: 978-1905713042

For information see last issue’s News in Magick Order here or at major bookstores and online distributors such as Amazon.com.

Inner Alchemy by Taylor Ellwood

Megalithica Books
by Lupa — Immanion Press Publicity Editor
No ISBN# available at time of issue release
Ordering information is here.

In Inner Alchemy, you’ll explore spaces unknown and places unvisited, right within your own body! The alchemy of the body and all of its mysteries are a fascinating realm, but often people ignore this realm, taking for granted the miracle that that they have around them everyday.

Have you ever wondered how you could work with your senses more? Or have you wondered when you’ve been sick if what you’re feeling is remotely useful? Inner Alchemy answers these questions and more! Explore the depths of your brain and meet neurotransmitter spirit guides who will guide you to better physical and psychological health. Discover the miracle within your DNA. Learn about energy work and what it can offer you.

Table of Contents:

• Introduction by Lupa
• Foreword
• Chapter One — Inner Alchemy 101
• Chapter Two — The five senses
• Chapter Three — Body Basics
• Chapter Four — Body Fluids
• Chapter Five — Neurotransmitter Magic
• Chapter Six — DNA Magic
• Chapter Seven — Basic Energy Work
• Chapter Eight — Intermediate Energy Work
• Chapter Nine — Advanced Energy Work
• Chapter Ten — Textual Alchemy
• Chapter Eleven — Learning to be Conscious
• Epilogue — Tying It All Together
• Appendix A — Entheogens: Should You Use Them or Not?
• Appendix B — The Detachment Ritual
• Appendix C — Neuro-Sorcery by Zac Walters
• Appendix D — Kink Magic by Taylor Ellwood and Lupa (Sneak preview of our co-written book)
• Appendix E — Bibliography

©2007 Lupa
Edited by Sheta Kaey

The first step to expanding your reality is to discard the tendency to exclude things from possibility. — Meridjet

Paradigm Shifting and Reality Tunnels

“‘Paradigm shift[ing]‘ has found uses… representing the notion of a major change in a certain thought-pattern — a radical change in personal beliefs, complex systems or organizations, replacing the former way of thinking or organizing with a radically different way of thinking or organizing…¹”

Robert Anton Wilson uses the phrase “reality tunnel” to describe looking at reality from a certain perspective². In occultism, these two concepts, paradigm shifting and changing one’s reality tunnel, essentially represent the same thing — changing your point of view in a profound way that influences your overall belief system, whether temporarily or permanently.

Within the spectrum of alternative spirituality, there are many beliefs that could be (and often are) labeled “unusual” or even “strange.” Anything from the Otherkin phenomenon to past lives as someone important, to believing one has a special destiny, and so on. It could be said that even Aleister Crowley bought the myth about having a special destiny, and if there’s one reality tunnel that I’ve seen in play with most consistency across great numbers of occultists, it’s the belief that one has some greater role in the shifting of humanity’s collective consciousness. There are people who believe they are angels incarnate, here to initiate great change. There are people who believe that they are going to become some powerful all-knowing guru/leader who will single-handedly shift the dominant paradigm.

We’re on a Mission From God™

Most commonly, there are people who believe that they’ve got something important, as yet unknown, to do in the overall change to a New Age or a New Aeon. These people typically believe that not only will they have an individual role, they will also be part of a small collective of super-VIPs. This typically evolves with a group of close friends, who will have a prominent collective role and purpose, even if they don’t know yet what that purpose is — and typically as friends are dropped or gained, the people playing the individual roles in the group change. Again typically, rarely does someone within the chosen few dare to question why this occurs. They tend to chalk it up to mistaken identity with regard to the rejected individual.

He who is rejected or who grows in a different direction from other individuals and thereby finds himself alone or with new friends will often face hurdles in adjusting his paradigm in a way that allows him to retain both a sense of purpose and an acceptance of past beliefs — beliefs that he may now view as “inaccurate.” He may feel that his former viewpoint was illusory and must be rejected as false, to allow full acceptance of the new viewpoint. He may feel that his earlier beliefs were silly, juvenile, or “fluffy.” Along the path of individual evolution, however, inevitably there comes a time when what is important now necessitates releasing something that was important at an earlier stage of your personal growth. When that shift concerns a key aspect of your personal mythology, such as what you believe to be your higher purpose, then there can be a great disillusionment. It’s difficult to evolve a core belief without feeling you must deny or dismiss the former view outright, either from embarrassment or from the simple need to distance yourself from a perspective that you feel is less evolved than the current view.

Does Change Have to Mean Rejection?

Reality is fluid. It changes with your perspective and your personal interpretation. Each person’s viewpoint is unique in all ways — this is the crux of consciousness, the single absolute factor in anyone and everyone’s existence. When you change your perspective and adopt a new preferred reality tunnel, the impulse to ridicule your old one is often irresistible. You can see this online with the frequent dissing of eclectic Wicca by former eclectic (non-initiate) Wiccans, who, for the most part, wouldn’t admit their past alliance in a million years. The recently-coined term “Neo-Wicca” was created, arguably, to set these eclectics apart, so that initiated Wiccans boasting a lineage could distance themselves from these fluffier, uninitiated counterparts — in other words, so they could feel superior.

However, it’s my opinion that when you dismiss a former perspective as stupid or embarrassing or otherwise not fit for public archiving, you cheat yourself out of valuable experience. It may always be with you, technically, but if you don’t embrace what you learned early in your magical history, not only will you be impatient with those less knowledgeable than you, but you will also develop a knee-jerk rejection to anything that smells too much like that old point of view, thereby potentially limiting your future growth.

Meridjet Speaks

Recently, Meridjet (my spirit companion) instructed a friend of mine about my friend’s recent paradigm shift, which was leading him to feel that his former perspective was in error. In fact, no reality tunnel can really be wrong, as Meridjet was quick to point out…

“All belief systems are metaphorical, because the reality is beyond your comprehension. This does not make them wrong.

“You are familiar, I’m sure, with various translations of old books, such as the Bible or the Tao Te Ching. Each translation bears the unmistakable mark of its translator. This shows in bias as well as in interpretation of more ‘objective’ concepts. Mythologies are interpretations of interpretations, ad infinitum, that give expression to basic archetypal concepts and beings. These mythologies are living and breathing histories in the sense that they have been infused with so much energy that they literally manifested accordingly. And yet, they remain interpretations, further interpreted by the translation of the mind of the reader or listener.

“The listener or seeker, for example, you, thereby invest your own energy into the personal interpretation that inspires your heart and brings you closer to something one might call “home.” When you bring others, like-minded, into your circle and together further interpret things and choose roles and what have you, this is just as literal as it is figurative — you are also creating your own group interpretation of the mythology. Through your group, the mythology continues to live and grow, just as it aids your growth.

“The figurative portion is what the mind brings into play in reaction to the literal portion, and the literal portion is created on the subtle planes in the realm of ideas by the figurative interpretation [of an experience] that you applied at the start. It’s a self-evolving paradigm, alive and real but also dependent upon a variety of factors for survival as what it is now. If you drop your role as [this person/being/archetype etc], for instance, then the mythology you lived will evolve on without you. This is how it should be. Perhaps a new being will take your place, perhaps not. Either way it does not matter, as the mythology lives through its proponents and vice versa. What happens to you is that your mythology evolves and moves, perhaps in a new direction than your circle in general — but this is not wrong. In fact, it is very right.”

“So yes, [the events of your past, and their relative interpretations] happened. You can’t invalidate it. But you can, and will over time, shift your view of it so that it might feel invalidated. As I once told Sheta, when we see the past, we see through the lens of today, of now, and that changes the past. You can’t see then through then’s eyes.

“Therefore, allow yourself your growth. Allow others their growth, or stagnation. Allow each to be what he will be — and be yourself, too. It will all bring you closer to where you want to be, if you do not deny it.”

It’s All About the Journey

When you undertake a conscious spiritual journey, you accept the challenges that arise, or you become one of those who can’t cope and so fall away from the trials of the “dark night of the soul” that all must experience at intervals. We learn by experience, and our perceptions of our experiences change with our growth and evolution. The “then” that Meridjet refers to will change in our view with our changing understanding. This is a neverending process. If you can beat the odds and weather the changes, you will be all the richer for it. In a future column, I will expand on these stages of learning and the challenges intrinsic to them. Meanwhile, just remember — the journey is the reason for the destination… not vice-versa.

Footnotes

1. Wikipedia
2. Cosmic Trigger I : Final Secret of the Illuminati ©1977 by Robert Anton Wilson

©2007 by Sheta Kaey
Edited by Trinity

Sheta Kaey is a lifelong occultist and longtime spirit worker, as well as Editor in Chief of Rending the Veil. She counsels others with regard to spirit contact and astral work. She can be reached via her blog.

It still amazes me that some Wiccans insist on claiming that their religion has existed since time immemorial. That statement is only strictly true if we consider the 1940s to be too far back to recall clearly. Wicca, of course, is only one example of the general occult trend of ascribing antiquity to traditions and ideas in order to gain them more credibility.

I am not trying to offend Wiccans with this editorial. The fact is that I, too, am a Wiccan! At the time of this writing, I await my first degree Alexandrian Witchcraft initiation this very weekend. The difference between myself and some others, however, is that I do not think that any religion or system of magic has to be older than the birth of Christ in order to be valid.

The history of Wicca is a pretty simple one, all things considered. It does not involve the political intrigue of Christianity, nor the wars of Islam and Judaism. While there are aspects of Wiccan history that many of us will never know (not having been there), we can still be certain of the majority of the story. A summary, including a bit of theorizing on my own part, may run thus:

When Christianity came to power, it did not do so all at once as many priests and preachers (not to mention the public school system’s history classes) tell it. Instead, it was a gradual process which involved politics, war, and a few willing and peaceful conversions to sweeten the mix a bit. The paganism of Greece, Rome, Egypt, the Middle East, and the remainder of Europe did not simply disappear. In many cases, clear survivals occurred in which people of both common and noble stock were found to be practicing something akin to a Pagan religion within their own household or community traditions for centuries after the spread of Christianity. It is well known that many more subtle survivals occurred within the Christian traditions themselves, especially Roman Catholicism and Orthodox Christianity. The cults of the Saints, praying to icons (or “ikons” for the Orthodox Church), various holidays, and more cultural traditions than I know of are all clear survivals of paganism. As an interesting note, the word “superstition” itself comes from the Latin word superstes, which refers to a survival, or “that which survives.”

It is quite evident from the above that some elements of paganism survived for quite a long time right under the noses of Church officials. I don’t believe that we have to stretch to suggest that various family and small community Pagan traditions survived even into the modern day in certain parts of Europe and the British Isles. It seems quite possible to me that Gerald Gardner could have been initiated into just such a small community tradition in the form of the New Forest Coven.

The New Forest Coven was unlikely to have resembled what we would call Wicca today. More likely, it was a rather incomplete grouping of celebratory ceremonies, superstitious beliefs, and odd bits of folk magic. Gardner clearly had to fill in some gaps when he formed his own tradition, and he did so with the material which was extant at the time: the ceremonial, Kabbalistic, and Hermetic materials of the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn and of Crowley’s Thelema. Gerald Gardner was definitely an initiated member of Crowley’s Ordo Templi Orientis in his day and was an enthusiastic Thelemite. I say this not to disparage the traditions of Wicca, but merely to show where many elements of Wicca find their source.

Many people read explanations and historical surveys like this one and immediately jump to the conclusion that Wicca is fabricated or fake. Such an attitude cannot be further from the truth, and here is the essential truth of the matter set down as clearly as I can make it:

It does not matter how old a tradition is or how it found its birth. What matters most is the relevance of the tradition for those who practice it. There. I’ve said it and I will not take it back. Those occultists and skeptics alike who speak disparagingly of Wicca because of its recent birth and mythologized beginnings need only look at their own traditions to see parallels. Even modern materialist science has been cobbled together from odd bits of scattered hypotheses put forth by numerous individuals, and has not existed in any real shape for more than a century and a half. Has modern science proved useless as a consequence of its recent advent, or the fact that many people still worship Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein as gods? Hardly. Similarly with occultism. Most of what we call the Western esoteric tradition was born with the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn, who themselves mythologized nearly all of their source material. Much of their ideology was lifted whole from the writings of Éliphas Lévi, who himself practically made everything up out of his own head. Much of the Golden Dawn’s practical material came from Francis Barrett’s The Magus, which was a very poor plagiarism of Agrippa’s Three Books of Occult Philosophy. Agrippa’s material itself was cobbled together from numerous sources, including Zoharic Kabbalism, Hermetic and Pythagorean philosophy, and Catholic Neoplatonism. Despite all this, the Golden Dawn’s system of magic is still one of the most influential and widely used traditions today. I will not argue that the Golden Dawn’s methods are ineffectual, as they have proven themselves to me as being extremely powerful when used properly. All of this comes down to two essential points:

1. There is no reason to lie about the origins of your own tradition. It is what it is, and as long as it works, there is no need to defend it.
2. It is pointless to put down the traditions of others as long as they are effectual for those who use them. It is nothing but a waste of your time.

No matter what anybody else has to say about it, I will continue training with Franz Bardon’s textbooks in my office and then retire outdoors to dance naked under Luna’s light with my Coven. For as long as these methods work for me, they will be my philosophy, my religion, and my magical traditions.

©2007 Nicholas Graham
Edited by Sheta Kaey

Nicholas Graham is the author of The Four Powers. You can read his blog here.

Aleister Crowley said that the True Will is one of the crucial things a magician should know, since the True Will is the basis of the being.

He goes on to talk at length about how True Will is the culmination of the basic core of the person. It is the most selfish part and is most concerned with the success and survival of the person — the part that is most likely to reflect what the person truly wants and needs.

It’s important to realize that just Knowing how to accomplish a goal or that Knowing yourself is not enough. You must also actively make the decision to do what you want, or all the training, all the experience is useless.

This is the essence of “To Will.” This is the actual decision point in the spell-casting process; it is when the magical process, the spell, actually begins. The training and study are the lead-in, the preparation to do the spell. Will is the stage where the decision that the spell is needed is made. It is when all the options are considered and the spell becomes one part of the overall process to cause the desired change to occur.

Many experienced magicians say that this point is when the spell is actually starting to be cast. This decision begins the consciousness shift to the altered states that are key to manipulating magic and successful ritual.

This act of deciding to cast the spell takes the process to the level of a goal instead of allowing it to remain as a simple desire like wanting to get a cola for lunch. It becomes a true desire, such as finding a job that will allow the caster to support their family better, one that motivates the caster to attain their goals no matter the cost or the obstacles placed in the way.

“To Will” also implies that the first leg of this pyramid has been attained. Knowing implies that you know what you really want, to the bottom of your soul. That is where your “True Will,” as Crowley put it, resides. Understanding your own Will, your own mind and desires, is paramount. How can you do a spell to bring success if you believe in the bottom of your soul that success of the spell means you will become something you despise? The ends are counter productive to your True Will.

Therefore, knowing your True Will is another critical part of this whole process.

The True Will is one part of every magician that should always be examined. Willing something into existence, as the Magician of the Tarot deck does, is a hard skill to master; you better be sure that this is what you want. There are no take-backs, no do-overs when you create something out of nothing.

Remember the advice, “be careful what you wish for, you might just get it”? That’s a heck of a double-edged sword.

Human beings are essentially wish generators with no off switch. Think of how many times you say, “I wish” in a typical day, without even meaning to. Once you start paying attention to that statement, you find that you say it a high number of times. You think it more than you actually say that phrase. And each of those thoughts and statements go out into the aether and have an effect there, even if we don’t see it.

Exactly like dropping a pebble into a pool of water, those ripples spread and start affecting other things and people. Eventually it does get reflected back, warped and diminished, but those reflections are still the original wish that was Willed into being.

So while a trained metaphysician and magician can create a situation that didn’t exist by will alone, they should always be cognizant of what can happen if they don’t watch what they think.

This discipline of the mind, of basic thought processes, should be one of the first goals for any training program of those who are psychically aware. Unfortunately, many of those who begin studying those who wish to begin immediately using power, to start casting spells without first understanding the discipline that is part and parcel of this path.

This series of articles is starting to show that there is a method to the Pyramid’s quick mnemonic, a level of depth that many don’t see. We can already see how “To Know” and “To Will” are fitting together and interlacing. It is becoming rapidly apparent that one cannot have just “To Know” without also having “To Will” and the other two legs of the Pyramid.

All this discussion on the Will may make you ask, “where do I train my Will into a razor-honed weapon?” I can’t help you with that because most of training the Will is about practice.

First you have to decide on a goal, preferably a goal that is difficult and which others say can’t be done. Then start on the journey to attain that goal. Along the way you must not despair and you must keep trying, believing even when it’s hard. Perseverance here is the key, although outsiders may see you and call you stubborn.

Keep doing that, over and over, keep out-stubborning the nay-sayers and keep attaining your goals, even if the effort may not be worth it in the end. That is a good primer for a strong Will. When problems appear, decide immediately that you will overcome them instead of denying the problem or capitulating to the problem. Your first reaction to a problem should be, “Okay, how do I overcome this?” instead of, “No, this can’t be happening.”

Choose goals that are attainable and reasonable. Don’t pick ones that are easily attainable, for that defeats the purpose of training. Pick ones that are difficult to gain, and then keep going at it until you gain that goal.

For example, one of the proudest moments I have had in my life was in martial arts when I severely hurt my hip in the dojo. I kept going anyhow with the night’s exercises for kicks, especially side kicks, which work the hips strenuously. I kept going even though I was in a lot of pain; I would not quit. I saw a lot of admiration in the eyes of my teachers that night.

There are all kinds of opportunities that present themselves. Just watch out for them, and understand that when you are training your mind you can’t give in even once, for that tells the subconscious that it’s okay to give in occasionally. It is the subconscious that really needs to know that you have a strong Will. If you choose to give up occasionally, this action destroys all the headway you have made during your training.

When you decide to out-Will a situation that could defeat you, you must carry through to the end, no matter where that decision leads.

Humanity is the only species I know of that can create simply with their thoughts. It is a huge gift and an awesome responsibility. This ability must be tempered with experience and wisdom. Knowing when to use Will is as important as knowing how or why.

The Will then becomes the paintbrush of Creation, and like all tools, it should be kept in good working order and put away safely, so it is not used inadvertently or carelessly.

©2007 Eric “Daven” Landrum
Edited by Sheta Kaey

Eric “Daven” Landrum is a Seax Wiccan and the author of Daven’s Journal.

Many people have been curious about our work with the glyph and have interacted with us on a number of levels in an attempt to understand what it is we’re doing. The following is the text of a sort of panel discussion in which these questions are addressed by the folks most intimately involved.

Interviewer: What the hell do you think you guys are doing?

Dr. Silver: In effect, we are trying to bring balance and harmony to our community by drawing upon the subtle forces of the cosmos and aligning them through the process of ritual with the larger macrocosm. Drawing upon the hexagram as the symbol of the macrocosm, and its embodiment in the planetary spheres. We are trying to “juice” our community with the radiant energy of the sun, in Tipareth. Source of Love, Compassion, and Beauty. Such energy is sorely needed in our world today.

Magnus Po: Birthing a machine which filters stray psychic emanations from a city into seven parts, those parts being analogous to the sevenfold division of humankind’s perception of the universe used in planetary magick. Workings then bring down additional energies to selected points for application.

Frater A.: I certainly can’t improve on that, aside from the remarks made earlier in the book.

Interviewer: What if somebody gets hurt? Helped?

Dr. Silver: What if? The actual causal relationships would be hard to track. My own philosophy states that pure will, unassuaged of purpose, and delivered of the lust of result, is in every way perfect. I’m comfortable with my intentions, and trust that whatever happens, or if anything happens at all, it will be for positive purposes.

Magnus Po: I suppose there is a possibility of woe in this as in any technology. The degree to which the innocent bystander is hurt is usually dependent on what kind of lunatic is at the wheel, what sort of idiot has his finger on the button & the specific type of imbecile at the controls. In this case I suppose that you will just have to take our word for it that we are just the right kinds of lunatics, certainly the correct types of idiots, and precisely the sorts of imbeciles you, and everyone else, would jump at the chance to place in positions of authority over a gargantuan world-changing energy juggernaut such as the Glyph. Actually we are all very ethical folks. Misuse in this generation is unlikely. As for the possibility of spontaneous dangerous effects on the energetic level I would suppose this to be most possible at the focii during a working. Those responsible would then be those affected.

Frater A.: We didn’t start this big puppy up without a pretty clear idea of how to shut it down if we have to. We expect subtle effects over the course of a few years…

Interviewer: What gives you the right? Did you study up on this first?

Dr. Silver: What gave the Druids the right to use Stonehenge? What gave the Egyptians the right to build the pyramids? Not that our project is anywhere so lofty, but the key is the intention and the perspiration behind that. We felt that our community with its rising crime, drug rates, road rage, family violence, police brutality, and such was an ideal candidate for bringing about change in conformity with Will. Our initial intention was positive, and instead of protests, sit ins, or political rallying, we choose to work in more subtle dimensions to facilitate change. All of us are quite well versed in magical philosophy and practice. My own interest as an anthropologist rested largely in my curiosity with Margaret Mead’s activities with a similar group in Denver.

Frater A.: I might add that what gives me the right, even the audacity, to run for public office, and, upon winning that office, make decisions that will affect thousands or even millions? It is much the same thing. We have a genuine willingness to improve the lives and lot of our fellows and of ourselves and are bending our will in that direction using the tools at our disposal.

Magnus Po: We are unaware of having stepped on someone’s toes and are eager to make right any injustice for which we are responsible. In terms of study this project is the overlap of our areas of obsession and that was how we came to it.

Interviewer: What’s with the Star of David?

Dr. Silver: The Star of David, or Hexagram, is a symbol of the Macrocosm in harmony. Two triangles symbolizing the “upper” celestial, and “lower” terrestrial energies come together to reflect the union of opposites in the coincidata oppositorum of the Cosmos. As the symbol of union, it rests in Tipareth, the Heart, were all dimensions meet. As such, it’s the ideal symbol for our purposes.

Magnus Po: This is actually a black-ops project of the Priory of Sion.

Frater A.: Oooh! That’s funny! We started by looking at the lay of the land and seeing what forms were suggested by it. We found a lot of geophysical features with relationships to each other of about 60 degrees and this suggested a triangle, not unlike the Denver device. However, a simple triangle suggests the number three and so the energies of Saturn. We didn’t want to build a device that manipulated odic force in a Saturnian way, so doubled the figure, checked it against the map and were amazed by the correspondences that resulted. We felt that something in the nature of Tipareth would serve us better; the project evolved from there.

Interviewer: To what end did you want to draw down the planetary energies?

Dr. Silver: In drawing upon the various planetary energies, we acknowledge all facets of being and respect their various spheres. Mars, Venus, Saturn, etc.… are all metaphorical expressions of dimensions of Being. As such, in our work we seek a holistic and integral harmony that shuts no key dimension out. The Blessing was meant as an overarching empowerment and harmonization for the town, though its effects are in no way geographically bounded by the hexagram itself.

Magnus Po: Possible applications are endless.

Frater A.: We’ve seen our odd-but-lovable city undergoing a certain cultural entropy and sought to, at the very least, attempt to balance the forces here on a large scale to see if it would have any notable effect, feeling that no significant harm is likely to arise.

Interviewer: Do you plan to use these energies in later workings?

Dr. Silver: I personally, plan to “use” these energies in as much as they affect me in my daily life in society.

Frater A.: It was assumed that the Glyph would provide concentrations of specific planetary energies and these energies might be used in, say, empowering a talisman. Talismanic magick has always interested me, partly because it is so easy to quantify/qualify the results of such magicks in a fairly scientific statistical manner: either a thing happens within a specified period or it doesn’t. Being an eyewitness to a number of talismanic “successes” and very few “failures” made a believer out of me years ago. The thought that these focuses might facilitate visioning “in the Spheres” was also been discussed at length, and our preliminary results are suggestive of success, but it’s too early to tell.

Interviewer: You drew all your triangles in the same direction. Do you think Tyson’s dictum against doing such has any merit?

Dr. Silver: I feel Tyson’s system works for him. I don’t feel there are such “hard and fast” rules in this game. The quality of intention is the key.

Frater A.: We were intrigued by this thought of tracing the triangles in both strengthening & balancing directions. We adhered pretty much to the G.D. figure because it was the only one we had to hand that made enough sense, what with designing heptarchic magick using a hexagonal figure. I’ve noticed that G.D. and derivative traditions seem to like to “wind up” a ritual (or force) using circumambulation while Aurum Solis (the framework within which we choose to operate) rites stress the balancing of such things. I suspect we thought of kicking the glyph into a sort of motion by invoking the presences/powers of the planets as thoroughly as we could. It makes a great deal of sense to us to conduct circumambulations in the manner Mr. Tyson’s method suggests and we have incorporated this in present works, as shown in earlier parts of the Book of the Glyph.

Interviewer: It seems that you were trying to evoke the power of the Sun with your hexagram. Does it make sense to do so by invoking the powers of all the planets?

Dr. Silver: As all the planets existence and energy emanates from the Sun, it makes total sense to invoke their power as expressions of the center of the solar system. Once again, in addressing the totality, all dimensions are seen in relationship to a larger whole.

Magnus Po: The emphasis on the Sun is, I think, incidental. The hexagram was settled on in large part for geographical reasons and this left one planet in the middle. The Sun was the obvious choice for cosmological^/psychological mirroring.

Frater A.: I’d like to think it wasn’t left so much to chance. We are invoking the qualities of the power of the Sun, e.g. harmony, balance. We see the entire figure of the Sun and his family of planets as creating a balanced figure in and of itself, which happens to be divisible into 7 discrete entities, each with their own unique utility. Considered Qabalistically, we are dealing with the Will, Tipareth and one’s Knowledge and Conversation with one’s Holy Guardian Angel, so I expect those sorts of energies to be magnified in some way, perhaps even if only on a small scale. I guess I mean to say that the Glyph is envisioned as taking in local, non-organized energy, then imparting a pattern to it. This energy is concentrated in various places but also spreads a harmonious influence within its bounds, radiating out into the adjoining countryside as far as whatever encountered friction allows. At least, that’s our visualization so associated.

Interviewer: Was your ritual design too grand in scope?

Dr. Silver: Asking for a job, a sex mate, or a new car is the common use of people’s will and intention. Asking to bring harmony and peace to one’s community is far from “Too Grand in Scope.” It is hoped others will take such interest in how the powers of will and intention on the plane of mind bring about effects in the larger community.

Frater A.: I’m not sure we can say yet. We plan to give it five-plus years of effort to see if it attracts interest outside of our small group. By a simple formula not unknown to dynamic sciences: if you’re not going to have as much energy, you’re going to need more time. We believe we can make a measurable difference (the Glyph being detectable to dowsing/magnetics/etc.) with 6-7 regular participants working for 4-5 years. But, at least one of us is the sort of person (had they enough personal influence on our local scene) who would schedule a road race to be run upon the Glyph’s very course while the “elect” held rites of alchymical transubstantiation at some key location(s). Forgive my waxing poetic — we think we’ll wait and see how large an area upon which it can actually have a notable effect. It is, after all, an experiment.

Magnus Po: Full sized circumambulation is an exertion. It is also a real pleasure. We have been flexible enough so far to deal with it, whereas rigid thoughtforms make such things unendurable.

Frater A.: Boy howdy!

Interviewer: Would it have made more sense to draw down the powers of the planets one at a time over a much longer period? Did you take care to balance the planetary energies, or if that was even a valid consideration?

Frater A: I was concerned that that this would produce a potential abundance of one sort of energy or another over too-long a time. All planets were used in the original invocations, each merely “hi-lighted” at a different time. As a point of note, Magnus Po and I set out one day on bicycles to map out the precise location of the glyph upon the lay of the land, and since at least one of us is no longer a spring chicken, we were unable to complete the second circuit until later. We traced Moon-Mars-Jupiter-Moon on that day and that night a disturbed individual (and some buddies, it is supposed) took a notion to run about town with bedsheets and spray paint, decorating places with nazi-type swastikas and white supremacist slogans. The cops figured that it wasn’t a serious threat — just some kids acting out some weird fantasy. We took this incident a bit to heart, as it’s hard to imagine a better connection to Jupiter, Mars and Luna! We’ve elected to be more careful in future, just in case.

Dr. Silver: I favor the “All together now” approach. We are going for a specific effect that addresses multiple facets of being in totality. Thus, by invoking the energies together we address their essential relationality, and integral embodiment in the larger domain of Tipareth.

Magnus Po: Maybe it would have been a good idea. In any case we coalesced it in little more than seven weeks. Balance is inherent in form and my subjective experience of the astral temples is that they are of equal magnitude.

Interviewer: It looks as if you started with Saturn and worked your way inward through the planets. Why start with Saturn?

Dr. Silver: Saturn is form and foundation. It’s the root and structure. By starting with Saturn, we give the macrocosmic glyph a lasting and grounded basis for more Mercurial, Jovial, or Venusian energies.

Frater A.: When the sun comes over the eastern horizon, it’s rays first reach the place consecrated to Saturn, therefore Saturn had to be first, just as the Sun had to hold the middle position. We personally fiddled with a variety of possible allocations of planets to geographical places before settling on the current arrangement. Saturn, you’ll note, has an association with the idea of “a gate,” and we thought this also appropriate for the easternmost point.

Interviewer: Have you had considered using a unicursal hexagram? That glyph gives you a clear way to move back into the center. Might this be helpful as a practical matter during the performance of the ritual?

Dr. Silver: Crowley’s Unicursal Hexagram, though having six points, does not convey the idea of the linking of macro and microcosms through the conjoining of two inverted triangles. The linkage of celestial and terrestrial energies is most visible in this diagram.

Frater A.: I sat down and attempted to trace the unicursal hexagram in a variety of ways and couldn’t come up with a satisfactory arrangement, no matter what I tried. Some describe the force of this hexagram as “weak” and we imagine this is due to the alleged fact that such a figure cannot be constructed precisely, using any real mathematical proofs. A hexagram cannot be unicursal, and relies upon the clever alteration of the width of the drawn line to accommodate the idea. The introduction of Crowley’s Magick says as much. Significantly, drawing this figure creates anything but a sense of balance and more a sense of taking two steps backwards followed by three little ones forward. The territory is covered but more in the manner of an ambling drunkard than in a straight forward formula of balance and equity. For what it’s worth, Po and I discovered that if you trace the planets out in their order as given on the Tree of Life, you’ll come up with the figure that adorns the fly-leaf of the book. If you trace it in the order suggested by our planetary holiday schedule, you will get a unicursal hexagram.

Interviewer: Your magick seems to have a geomantic component to it. You can draw down the energy and establish the astral temples, but it seems that these temples must be grounded and founded on the earth for their greatest effectiveness. Stamping on the earth, calling the spirits of the earth for your aid seems like a good idea.

Dr. Silver: The Chinese geomantic art of Feng Shui with which I am familiar, addresses “Dragon Lines,” celestial “energies” and terrestrial forces through various methods, including landscaping, invocation, ritual, and such. Very little, if any “stamping” is visible in the Chinese relationship to receptive, earthy, “Yin” energies. This seems to be largely a creation of Western earth based religions. As such, there is no inherent need for such action.

Magnus Po: Temples are grounded because we are. Things must be located somewhere. Things astral manifest physically through a place to which they are anchored by natural or artificial correspondence (or through the mind/intent of an autonomous being).

Frater A.: The geomancy thing comes up quite a bit, but that’s not at all what we had in mind. I didn’t even know that the act of driving metal pins in the ground was a part of that tradition. I don’t fully subscribe to what’s going around this set of theories because I can’t really find much science behind it.

Interviewer: You perform part of the ritual with a willow wand. Perhaps that wand was a gift from the tree? Did you get any impression as to how local spirits/devas/dryads reacted to your ritual?

Dr. Silver: They liked it.

Frater A.: Yes, YES! We broke the damn tree! It was an accident, okay? But seriously — you’re right. We merely preserved a portion of the tree for later/permanent use in the rites that might follow. Laws of Association and Contagion, you see. We’ve seen a number of animals in various parts of the glyph and it’s interesting to note that some plant life is springing up, many of the wildflowers quite pertinent to their location.

Interviewer: Could it be that you were building upon the energy matrix that was already present?

Magnus Po: As above, so below. If one applies a natural form to the world one comes up with correspondences whose apparent significance says much about the world, the symbol, and the one doing the application. We are all it, unfolding, forever: Ewige Blumenkraft! In other words, I have absolutely no inkling whatsoever.

Frater A.: It was our assumption that some sort of energic flow is present in any case, likely modified by arrangements of geophysical features in the area. We wished to discover this arrangement and expand upon it, refining it, if possible.

Interviewer: Did you do any dowsing or any other kind of preliminary observations that could help verify this hypothesis?

Dr. Silver: Not to my knowledge.

Frater A.: Not as yet. That is part of our plan for evaluation.

Interviewer: What would constitute a success in the context of this ritual? For example, success can either be achieving whatever goal is held in the conscious mind, or good but unintended consequences that seem meaningfully related to the work.

Dr. Silver: Success for me would be a greater sense of ease, and harmony in my own relationship to my community, which I do feel, and in the overall tone of people’s relationships in our community.

Frater A.: We would consider success to be along those same lines, generally. In particular, this is a success if it a) is detectable by magickal or scientific means, b) shows any sign of attracting people to its maintenance, c) can be shown to positively effect the charging of talismans, d) can be shown to positively affect experiments in scrying, pathworking or similar workings. This is where we are headed, but it is very early in the game, we feel, so this is far from an exhaustive list.

Interviewer: Have you noticed anything that points towards the achievement of your goals or any unintended consequences, good, bad, or indifferent?

Dr. Silver: I enjoy the company.

Frater A.: It’s too early to tell, but there have been reports from Po that these exercises have stirred something odd in him and put a finer polish on his visualization skills. The feelings the rest of us have are about as vague at this point. It is interesting to note that, in the first period of evaluation, we obtained the services of a few “remote viewers” or clairvoyants and asked them to check up on what we had done, feeling fairly certain that they did not have access to much of the specific details of the project. The results they returned were quite significant. The overall shape and precise location were both described by these people. But stay tuned! That’s the sort of thing that’s going into Glyphbook 2.

More information about the Western traditions of planetary magick and the Companions of the Glyph can be found on their website located at: www.geocities.com/athens/oracle/8465.

This interview originally appeared in Cup of Wonder magazine.

©2006 Frater Auxilior Arti
Edited by Sheta Kaey.

Frater Auxilior Arti (nee Fr. Adsum Iterum) is an initiate of the Astrum Sophia, co-founder of the Companions of the Glyph and author of the Book of the Glyph and PRAXIS: The 2nd Book of the Glyph. A life-long student of the paranormal, he brings a scientific/Fortean viewpoint to the subject, a thing he feels is sadly neglected. You can find his Facebook page here.

Animal magic always has been and probably always will be my favorite form of esoteric study and practice. I’ve been fascinated by critters since I was barely old enough to toddle around on my own; I’ve had many pets, and I was always the kid out in the woods catching garter snakes.

So it was no surprise that the very first book I picked up was Ted Andrews’ Animal-Speak. While it wasn’t the first animal totem dictionary (being predated by Conway’s Animal Magick, Sams’ and Carsons’ Medicine Cards, and a few other books by several years) it was by far the most complete book on the topic at the time. It, and the later sequel Animal-Wise, covered the totemic and magical meanings and uses of numerous animals from around the world in great detail. Andrews also provided the reader with substantial material for finding and working with animal totems.

Ten years later I’ve read most of the books out there on totemism and animal magic. I’ve picked through some really horrible animal magic cookbooks of prefabricated spells, and I’ve enjoyed seeing some really innovative twists, too. However, overall I’m disappointed at where this particular field of study and practice has gone in the past decade.

The primary problem is that it seems that just about everyone is trying to be Ted Andrews. His totem animal dictionaries were so popular that other authors have since then tried to cash in on the format. These days the standard book starts off with historical information on totems, then goes into methods of divining and working with your totem(s), and after that includes a series of entries detailing specific animals and their qualities. The order and exact execution of these may change, but they’re almost universally present.

Of the twenty-five books I’ve reviewed on Amazon concerning animal magic, nineteen of them contain dictionaries. Of the six books that lacked dictionaries, only one, Yasmine Galenorn’s Totem Magic, was specifically tailored to the neopagan crowd. Of the rest, one was an early 20^th century treatise on serpent worship, two were anthropological studies of animal symbolism in indigenous cultures, one was a book of meditations based on the spirituality of various First Nations, and the last was a psychotherapeutic system combining totems and the seven primary chakras.

These are just with the books that are specifically about totem animals. This doesn’t include several books on Neoshamanism that included very abbreviated power animal dictionaries. There are also a number of animal totem divination decks out there, most of which are purportedly designed to identify your totem. The books are again dictionaries with prefabricated information, often with even less detail than the dictionaries without cards.

Admittedly, there have been some improvements. Thanks to Andrews’ inclusion of many different species, writers on totemism no longer seem to limit their study to big, impressive North American mammals and birds. I am seeing more books that avoid cultural appropriation of indigenous cultures. Where in 1988 we had the Medicine Cards, which lumped all First Nations people into one group of noble savages (apparently the progeny of Atlanteans), in 2006 I’ve managed to find at least some books that avoid trying to be more Native than the Natives, though it still happens.

In the past couple of years, a few authors have started covering new territory. Galenorn’s Totem Magic is a notable example, as is Animal Spirit by Patricia Telesco and Rowan Hall, both of which go beyond the usual “This totem means this, and this one means that, and now stick a feather on your altar and light some incense,” etc. The latter book particularly perked my ears because it had a chapter touching on the uses of animal parts in magic, breaking a bit of a Pagan taboo. For my own part, my Fang and Fur, Blood and Bone covers a number of topics in animal magic, including a unique look at totemism, practical magic with animal parts, and even a chapter on animal sacrifice.

But that’s really about it. Eight and a half years after I picked up Animal-Speak, nearly ten years after I discovered Paganism, I read Steven Farmer’s Animal Spirit Guides, published in October 2006. I was hoping for something new. Instead I found… just another totem animal dictionary.

This is my challenge to animal magicians, whether you work with totems or power animals, familiars physical or spiritual, animal parts or animal sacrifice: Stop doing the same old stuff! There’s a lot of potential in animal magic, even within a neoshamanic format. For example, try combining totemism with the eight colors of chaos magic to do some inner pathworking. Or do as I did and create new species on the astral plane to help you with your magic. Try working with pop culture-based animals, too, and utilize the mythology in our own culture.

And if you are doing something different, speak up. Share what you’ve discovered with the world. You don’t have to write a book; even an article or a website would suffice. But there has to be something available besides totem animal dictionaries. We don’t need any more. The only reason I’ve kept as many as I do is so that I have some introductory material for the people I lead on guided totem meditations, just to get them started. I’ve stopped keeping the newer ones I acquire once I’ve read them — one backpack full is enough. The rare book I do keep is the one that shows me something new and innovative.

I have 24 books or book-and-deck kits on my Amazon wish list that are related in some way to animal magic, plus one or two books on my shelves I haven’t gotten to yet. About eight of them are more along anthropological lines and another eight or so are book-and-deck kits. Of the ones that are written for a pagan audience, I’m hoping at least one will show me something new. Here’s to that hope.

©2007 Lupa
Edited by Sheta Kaey.

Lupa is the author of Fang and Fur, Blood and Bone: A Primal Guide to Animal Magic, A Field Guide to Otherkin, and co-author of Kink Magic, among other works. You can read her blog at http://therioshamanism.com and see her website at http://www.thegreenwolf.com.

Recently, I decided to do a grieving ritual for my time in academia. I’d dropped out of my Ph.d in 2005 and for almost a year had not really had a chance to process the emotions over leaving under such circumstances. My wife had bought me the Voyager Tarot, and I needed to break it in, so I decided to use it to help me divine the various causes of my grief. By objectifying my grief through the reading, I could draw those elements out of my psyche and take control of my grief, bring it to a resolution.

The central card was Logic, which accurately represented academic thought processes and so was the core of the particular sorrow I wanted to evoke.

The card to the bottom left was a card that explained the mission of the Voyager Tarot. The lines that stood out to me were: “Voyager Tarot is a mirror extension of yourself. Respect it as you Respect yourself¹.” The words “mirror” and “respect” especially resonated with me. I’ve always used mirrors as a gateway to myself, and I realized that I needed to find some respect that I’d lost for myself in leaving academia.

To the immediate left was the Sun card, representing glory and power. In this particular case, it represented a feeling of disempowerment that I’d felt as a result of my academic experiences. That disempowerment came in the form of a loss of self-confidence in my writing and in who I identified myself to be.

On the upper left was Compassion, which indicated a need to forgive myself as well as the others in the situation. I tend to hold grudges for a long time, both toward myself and other people. In order for me to find my peace I knew needed to forgive everyone involved.

Above the Logic card was the Seeker Card. This one represented both my desire to seek a resolution and the vulnerability I’d felt as a seeker of knowledge in academia. It was the loss of my social life (at that point in time), but also the loss of my innocence. When I’d gone to academia I’d sought a community of fellowship and had quickly found that no such community existed and that a lot of competition was involved in the learning process.

The card on the upper right hand corner was time-space and represented my feelings of bitterness over spending three and a half years in a Ph.D. program, without getting the degree. There’ve been times where I’ve felt I wasted those three and a half years. Rationally I know otherwise, because all experiences are never wasted. Emotionally, I was irrational and wanted those three and a half years back.

To the immediate right was the learner card, which represented the loss of wonder and enjoyment in learning I experienced when I realized academia was a game and not quite the place of learning I’d thought it was. I wanted learning to be fun again, instead of being a tedious chore of proving who could drop more names than the other person.

The card to the lower right was confusion, which represents what I felt and still feel about my academic experience. I was confused by how I got to the point where I needed to leave the program. I was also confused by the feelings of bitterness I had over choosing to leave, and the wistful longing that occasionally brought up a desire to be back in academia.

After I did the reading, I left the cards out and pulled out my art supplies. I felt it was useful for me to grieve by evoking and expressing that grief. I allowed each tarot card to register in my mind’s eye and then asked the consciousness of that card to take over and guide my hands in painting the symbols that best expressed the meanings I’d found in the cards. I also wanted to paint how those meanings related to each other, by creating in the symbols a linkage to the other symbols.

During the actual painting, I didn’t feel any grief. The trance I was in focused more on getting the symbols on paper. But the creation and linkage of those symbols was also meant to create a gate in the painting, for the purpose of containing and evoking the energy of the emotions I felt, so that the energy could be put to better use than in a continual cycle of grief and anger.

Once the painting was completed, I vividly recalled the feelings I associated with academia. The frustration I felt at failing the exams, the politics, the three and a half years of time I’d invested into the degree, not getting the degree, the loss of confidence and the feeling of disempowerment I felt; all of these feelings surged with a vengeance into my consciousness. My chest felt heavy, as if a large block was on it. I then opened my mouth and “vomited” the energy into the painting. A loud keening cry of sorrow came from throat as I gave voice to the grief and regret I felt over everything that had happened. This continued for quite a while. When I could no longer give voice to my grief, I stopped. The energy had gone into the painting, where I could access it as needed, but where it would also no longer be a toxic presence in my life.

I’ve always taken the approach that any and everything has its uses. I’ve used similar evocations of emotions before to store away emotional energy. I still feel the energy, but it’s then recycled and stored away until it’s needed for magical workings. I no longer wallow in the pain. Instead, those emotions are directed toward accomplishing specific goals and tasks that will help me achieve my desires. I would note that a person shouldn’t think I’ve closed myself off from the emotions or denied their validity. The purpose of the ritual is to grieve, to vent, and give the sorrow a voice, but also to redirect that energy so it no longer cycles back to the subconscious to torment me further.

As an interesting side note, after doing this ritual, some of my insecurities reared their heads, probably because of the deep plunge into the subconscious to deal with the lingering emotional issues concerning academia. In particular, I had a vivid nightmare of being judged by a panel of people. Over the next day and a half, these insecurities were expressed in several different ways, through online posts and through just feeling the emotions. However, in each case I was able to consciously act in regards to the insecurities and come to a resolution that was beneficial for those feelings. I think these insecurities woke up because they related to the issues in the painting. In other words, it was the rest of the emotions expressing themselves before being funneled into the painting where they could be stored until evoked for magical purposes.

Footnotes

1. Voyager Tarot Kit: Intuition Cards for the 21st Century Wanson & Knutsen 1984

©2007 Taylor Ellwood
Edited by Sheta Kaey

Taylor Ellwood is the author of Space/Time Magic, Inner Alchemy: Energy Work and the Magic of the Body, and Pop Culture Magick, among other works. You can visit his blog at http://magicalexperiments.com/ and his website at http://www.thegreenwolf.com/.